Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The Big Aristotle

It seems that bernice idol and all-around legend Shaquille O'neal is at it again.


 Lo and Behold, the man has a twitter. it seems that microblogging is this new thang, where someone can text random thoughts to a website and have someone read them. cool.
Shaq's "Tweets" are pretty, uh, interesting, it seems he has taken a pattern of saying things and then crediting himself with quotes, or quoting other people, although spelling mistakes about:

Some unfiltered highlights:

There's self-reflection,
Id like people to think of me as someone who cares about them Princess diana

Wisdom:
Every succesful person owes somebody a thank you, just make sure u thank them Shaquille oneal
Go were yo dreams take u, live the live u have imagined Shaquille oneal

Love:
All my life, i pray for someone like you, and i thank god that i finally found you Kci and jojo

Laments:
Whatthe hell iswrong wit da suns

Current Events:
Does anyone have the names of the 14 people bush gave pardons

Self Definition:
My genius is 1 percent inspiration 99 percent perspiration Shaquille o'neal

Run-ins with celebrity athletes:I JUST MET KIMBO SLICE, DATS A MEAN DUDE
AND NO I WOULD NOT FIGHT HIM, I'M A LOVA NOT A FIGHTA

Movie Reviews:
Just saw punisher, great bloody movie, aggggggh, dats what i , nevamind lol, aggggggh (growl) (snarl) spit

Childhood Memories:
How come i have the mr rogers neighborhhood theme song stuk n my head, iz he still alive

And finally, Confusion:
Why do they call minneapolis, the twin cities, nobody here looks a like, waaa waaa waaaaaa

5 comments:

Weaselbag said...

It should be noted that he corrected his misspelling of "life":

"LIVE THE LIFE U IMAGINED, JEEZ I SUCK AT TYPIN, LOL"

Weaselbag said...

"Startn 2morro if u c a homeless person, feedem, only if u can"

If you see one today, pretend they don't exist.

Weaselbag said...

Somehow, he doesn't seem as tough anymore now that I know his favourite song is "Never Too Late" by Three Days Grace.

Still though, he made candy fall from the sky and french toast fly around a kitchen. Repeckt.

THREE COMMENTS IN A ROW WHATCHU GONNA DO ABOUT IT

I Can't Give You Anything but Love said...

Psh, Matilda did that french toast shit too.

I love this guy. I'd never understood what Twitter was for; now I do. I wonder if it supports multiple authors!

zekethejewishsatanist said...

That's it. I'm having french toast for breakfast.